Euro 2024

[jimmy jazz]

I've not kept up with it too much because I was at Download festival.

The Scotland vs Germany game was on while we were watching bands, getting skudded 5-1 while you are in England is not ideal 😂.

 

You're a good egg Fetcher.

[FETCHER.]

At least they partially redeemed themselves in the next game. Tonight's will be crucial. To the skirl of the bagpipes! Or something. Fry up some haggis? Remember Robbie Burns? Arrest this man for racist remarks? What man? That rapidly-disappearing dot in the distance?   

Haha I hope they do well, there will be no haggis just yet though!!

I've seen a lot of people share pipe band videos in Germany... I would absolutely love to be there for that alone 😍

[Trollheart]

From today it's only (!) two matches a day and they're played at the same time, so I'm going to be, though watching football, as if I were at a tennis match: check this channel, check that channel, goal there, miss there, that was never a penalty ref are ye blind, what happened in the other match while I was making comments on the ref's sight etc! Gonna be fun! Sore neck on the way!   

[FETCHER.]

There is plenty swearing going on in my household at the moment.

Fingers crossed Scotland 🤞🙏

[FETCHER.]

I hope to god that Barnabás Varga is okay 🙏

[Trollheart]

What the actual FUCK???!!! Not a penalty? Someone fire that ref. Out of a cannon! Jesus! Unbelievable!           

[jimmy jazz]

Dramatic.

[FETCHER.]

Wheesht Jimmy 😜 we were robbed

[Trollheart]

TODAY'S MATCHES AND RESULTS


GROUP A

Germany 1 - Switzerland 1


After slipping to second place during the match, with the score 1-0 against them, Germany fought back with a last-gasp equaliser to regain their position at the top of Group A and go through to the next round. The Swiss turned out to be a tougher opponent than was originally envisaged.

Scotland 0 - Hungary 1

After a pretty poor display by the Scots, they wuz robbed when a clear and stonewall penalty was not only turned away by the idiotic ref, but also not overturned by VAR. My cat could have told you that was a penalty, and he's dead. As the match looked to be heading for a nil-all draw, Hungary scored in the final seconds of TEN MINUTES of extra time (mostly occasioned by the serious injury and removal to hospital of one of the Hungarian players) to break Scottish hearts and send them home. Again.


Tomorrow's matches

Group B

Croatia v Italy Expected outcome: you'd have to think Italy would take this one, though they haven't been playing as well as they should be. Prediction: 1-0 Italy.

Albania v Spain Expected outcome: again you would be extremely surprised to see one of the hot favourites for the title lose to lowly Albania. Prediction: 3-0 Spain.


Never quite realised how hard it is to watch (and listen to) two matches at once! In the end, neither was exactly a goalfest, though there was controversy, such as it is, in both, with first Switzerland scoring against Germany before the Germans equalised, and that mad lack of a penalty and then the hammerblow of a Hungarian goal in the dying moments of the Scotland match. You gotta feel for the Scots: next time lads, next time.

[jimmy jazz]

Wheesht Jimmy 😜 we were robbed

Yes I won't be a dick about it.

Hungary were lucky to get that decision.

[jimmy jazz]

Croatia vs Italy for me.

I don't really like either of these but as Croatia are the shitter team it's probably better that they go through. Both need win so should be good.

[Trollheart]

TODAY'S MATCHES AND RESULTS


GROUP B

Albania 0 - 1 Spain

They put up a good fight and didn't roll over, but the Spanish know how to hold on to a lead, and they, as expected, top the group while Albania head back to wherever they came from.

Croatia 1 - Italy 1

A much tighter match than it would seem from the scoreline. Croatia bossed the possession and Modric missed a penalty but scored almost immediately afterwards, marking, it would seem, his towering presence once more on the tournament, probably for the last time. Unfortunately they couldn't hold on and Italy, despite a pretty uninspiring performance overall, snatched it at the death after EIGHT minutes of extra time, literally in the dying seconds. Italy now go through and while Croatia have a mathematical chance of also doing so, it's more than likely this ends their Euro 2024 journey.

Tomorrow's matches

Jesus scoring on the rebound in extra time! If I thought watching two matches at once was hard (it is) try watching FOUR tomorrow! No, not four at once: what do you think I am, Cerberus with an extra head? But still, four matches, two of each of which will take place at the same time. Gonna be a busy one!

Group C

England v Slovenia Expected outcome: doesn't really matter. With the exit of Albania from the tournament England, France and the Netherlands are all guaranteed to progress. Prediction: 1-1

Denmark v Serbia Expected outcome: could be tight but I would fancy Denmark to come through. Prediction: 2-1 Denmark

Group D

Netherlands v Austria: Expected outcome (see above) Prediction: 1-0 Netherlands.

France v Poland Expected outcome (see above, and also note Poland are already heading to the airport after this, so maybe pride to play for, but meh) Prediction: 2-0 France


Overall, not two of the greatest matches, but the Italy/Croatia far the more entertaining, as described above. Albania tried their best but really the mighty Spain swept them aside, as expected. They've made some friends here though, punching above their weight, and will be missed. You really have to feel for Croatia, who played Italy more or less off the park and were about to hand the Azzuri an embarrassing exit from the tournament, and you also have to wonder where the hell eight damned minutes extra time came from? But, them's the breaks, and I guess that's the last we'll see of Luka Modric in a Croatia shirt. At 38, he's likely to retire now from the international game, having carved his own legend upon European and world football over almost twenty years.

[jimmy jazz]

Posting in advance, we're going to fuck Slovenia hard tomorrow.

The players are under pressure and I can see a fire and anger in their comments.

Quote me and laugh at me but tomorrow they're going to prove a lot of England fans wrong.

I hate England fans BTW. And it's not for the reason you would think.

They absolutely hammer the team regardless of what happens. If we win 4-0 it's because the other team was shit. If we lose its because we're shit. Before we beat Germany at the last Euros they were almost all certain we were going out because the narrative is we go out to the first decent team we face. Then we beat Germany and suddenly Germany are a shit team.

They never, ever give credit to the team or manager.

We have a reputation of being arrogant but the truth is so far away from that it's unbelievable. They're saying Bellingham is overrated now.

And the fact they have been slating Kane for years?!

Honestly.

[Trollheart]

I'm so sorry, but I am going to piss myself laughing if Slovenia stuff you! 
I do wish you luck though.
In fairness, the English team could take a lesson from the Scots. When they were thrashed by Germany they didn't whine about it, blame the manager, the media or even the Germans. They took it like men, realised it wasn't good enough, and gave it the old Scottish try. I respect them more for that.

Now apparently Southgate is all hand-wringing and finger-wagging at the media for being so mean to his team that they put them off, dispirit them? Come on! They're grown fucking men, and they're in an international tournament. Man up for fuck's sake guys. The fact is, they were lucky to get through as they did. Surely even you are not going to suggest they breezed through, that they showed themselves a proper prospect for the finals? They came up against a poor Serbian side and were damned lucky to stumble through against Denmark, literally faults on both sides, each goal the result of a mistake for both teams. They're not the Golden Generation, no matter what anyone may think. They may make it against Slovenia, but really, what does that prove? I know I'm using your maxim, but look: Serbia, nothing special. Slovenia, nothing special. Denmark, old and tired and themselves just staggering through against poor oppostion. Spain or France ye're not!

Nevertheless, you're through anyway so what does it matter? What annoys me is that if you*, as you probably will, thrash Slovenia, you'll be all "Enger-land! Enger-land!" when you're expected to win and are through no matter what. Wait till you come up against some proper opposition before you puff yer chest out. I mean, you weren't exactly in the Group of Death, now were ya? 

Before you go off on one, I admit England have had some famous victories (Germany 5-1 anyone?) and I respect** them for those ones, but your current record in the Euros don't have any of them. Yet.

* This does not refer to you specifically or personally, but all England fans, supporters and especially the players.

** Obviously, to the limited extent any true Irishman can be said to respect an English team!

[Marie Monday]

They're calling Bellingham overrated? He seemed to be almost the only one who was trying. Do they expect him to fly the team to victory on his magic wings?
I think you're too hasty though, group stage performances don't necessarily say much (and France didn't exactly impress me either, I haven't seen the other title favourites though). They may get it together once the pressure's on and then the cheering would be not so much a pretense that everything has always been great and more something like: finally a decent game, we seem to have got it together finally, let's fucking go.
Alternatively, a team that plays uninspired, fangless football can still be very hard to beat and claw their way to the title via scrappy wins and penalties, but let's hope for the sake of football quality that that won't happen.

Anyway it's been fun reacquainting myself with the Dutch team a little. Xavi Simons seems like a bit of a cunt and I was almost glad his goal got rejected. Ake (looks very charming) and van Dijk (handsome and regal) are my favourites so far. I wondered where is Daley Blind is. I used to like him, is he too old already, did he fall off, or what