Emergency Contact List

[Trollheart]

We did this back in MB days, so I thought I'd bring it up again. The idea, for those who don't know, is to pick one trustworthy person (or have someone volunteer) and that person is then given contact details for each of us. In the event someone is not heard from for some time (can be a set period or arbitary, but not to be misused) that person may then contact the number given, to see if there is cause for concern. Obviously, this would only be done in extreme cases, when all other methods of contact have failed, and the contact details would not be shared with anyone else. I might suggest - sorry to use the term but it might be appropriate - a next-of-kin contact too, because, let's face it, if you're gone you're not answering your phone, and we still won't know.

Is anyone a) interested in doing this or b) has objections to it and if a) does anyone c) want to volunteer or nominate someone? Nobody is obliged to do this: it's a pretty serious trust and I can imagine some people might not want that sort of responsibility. But if anyone wants to volunteer, if we're going ahead, let me or Tore know.

It's a particularly relevant question when you look at what happened to Plankton and, more recently, Ribbons, and I think it would be good to have something in place.

Your thoughts and comments are welcomed.

[Lexi Darling]

I think it's a noble cause, though (and correct me if I'm not reading you right) I'm not sure I'm super hot on the idea of naming one person as the one to entrust multiple people's personal info to. I think it might be better to encourage people on the forum who have others on here they deeply trust to name them as emergency contacts. Divide and conquer seems like a good strategy here.

[Trollheart]

Point taken, but my idea is to have indeed one person entrusted with the information. Then you don't have multiple people ringing multiple numbers to check on multiple instances of multiple members who have slipped through into multiple dimensions. Could get messy.

No, ideally one person everyone trusts, who becomes the sort of "control and command centre" for contacting members who have not been seen for a while. I know who I'd trust, and who I think everyone would trust, but they have to agree to do it of course. I also feel there's far less chance of details being accidentally shared/divulged if it's just one person, like placing all your important information in one safe or something. Anyway, that's how I see it: one person to whom we can turn and say "what happened to [insert member here] - I really should have thought about rephrasing that, shouldn't I?  - person nominated as contact member (this is just getting worse!) can you call them and check?"

Otherwise you're in a situation where, to use names at random, DJ goes missing and we have to work out who has his details, and all the while he's battling a Great White shark somewhere in the Caribbean and just waiting for that call that will distract the beast enough for him to wriggle free and swim off, giving it the finger.

Anyone else agree/disagree?

[Lexi Darling]

Point taken, but my idea is to have indeed one person entrusted with the information. Then you don't have multiple people ringing multiple numbers to check on multiple instances of multiple members who have slipped through into multiple dimensions. Could get messy.

No, ideally one person everyone trusts, who becomes the sort of "control and command centre" for contacting members who have not been seen for a while. I know who I'd trust, and who I think everyone would trust, but they have to agree to do it of course. I also feel there's far less chance of details being accidentally shared/divulged if it's just one person, like placing all your important information in one safe or something. Anyway, that's how I see it: one person to whom we can turn and say "what happened to [insert member here] - I really should have thought about rephrasing that, shouldn't I?  - person nominated as contact member (this is just getting worse!) can you call them and check?"

Otherwise you're in a situation where, to use names at random, DJ goes missing and we have to work out who has his details, and all the while he's battling a Great White shark somewhere in the Caribbean and just waiting for that call that will distract the beast enough for him to wriggle free and swim off, giving it the finger.

Anyone else agree/disagree?

Fair point as well. I guess my issue then would be how we would decide who on the forum is trusted the most by the most people. Maybe have some kind of vote? Of course we'd have to establish that there is general interest in doing the project first I suppose.

[Trollheart]

Yes, this is the next step, assuming there's any sort of broad support, or any at all, for the idea. Voting is an idea, but still, I wouldn't vote for someone who didn't want to do it. Nobody is being forced to be "the guy" here. I would prefer a volunteer. I'd do it, but I don't think it would work, what with time zones and international calls and all. Anyway, as you say, step one is to see if there is any support for the idea, because if not, then there is no step two.

[.]

I don't trust anyone here enough to give them my personal contact information. Don't know how others feel about it but I'm not really for giving my info out on an internet forum.

[Lexi Darling]

Yeah, that's why I have only felt comfortable giving mine out to people I'm in more private correspondence with on other platforms. And that's me, I feel like I'm not that guarded with details about my life compared to a lot of others, probably to a fault.

[Marie Monday]

This is just unnecessary, anyone can ask to give their info to someone else if they want to be reachable in times of emergency, in practice most of us already have forum people in our phone or discord contacts. There is no reason why it has the be one designated person or why it should be organised centrally

[.]

This is just unnecessary, anyone can ask to give their info to someone else if they want to be reachable in times of emergency, in practice most of us already have forum people in our phone or discord contacts. There is no reason why it has the be one designated person or why it should be organised centrally

This and not only this but to have one person have all that contact information and then we just trust they won't one day decide to have a meltdown and use that information for ill intentions just doesn't sit right with me. I just don't see the point. People also get bored of forums and if said person also decides they don't want to be part of a forum anymore, they would still have access to that information which even more so lends itself to misusing that information.

[Lisnaholic]

This is just unnecessary, anyone can ask to give their info to someone else if they want to be reachable in times of emergency, in practice most of us already have forum people in our phone or discord contacts. There is no reason why it has the be one designated person or why it should be organised centrally

^ Is that so ?! It makes me realise how many of the people I used to swap recs with have now moved on.
Without s_k, rostasi, Neapolitan, and Pet_Sounds, my PM box is pretty empty these days.

I think it's a noble cause, though (and correct me if I'm not reading you right) I'm not sure I'm super hot on the idea of naming one person as the one to entrust multiple people's personal info to. I think it might be better to encourage people on the forum who have others on here they deeply trust to name them as emergency contacts. Divide and conquer seems like a good strategy here.

I agree with Marie and Lexi, that having one central holder of contact info is not the way to go, because of the moral of that story about putting all your eggs in one basket - and because of what Key just posted. Better by far to have any contact info spread out, rather like the way teachers do when they take kids on a field trip: each child has a nominated buddy and they are responsible for keeping track of each other.

That way, (i) there wouldn't be a masterlist of contact info, with the vulnerabilty that that implies and (ii) each person can choose who precisely would be ringing round family and friends if they should go AWOL.

If this hybrid system appeals to anyone, we could just use this thread to announce, for example: "If I go missing for more than 2 months, you can ask X to reach out on the number he has."
Concerned Forum members would know who to approach about a missing member, though the contact details would be at one remove from being publicly available.

[Lisnaholic]

... also, @ Trollheart: It's a decent idea to have some back-up contact system that covers everyone, but you have clearly never been in a terrorist, communist, or WWII underground-resistance group. In any of those places, if you said, "I know! Let's put everybody's name and contact info into one big fat book!" I'm afraid you would've been viewed with some suspicion!

[Trollheart]

I resent that. How do you know I've never been in a terrorist organisation? I am Irish, after all. Very quick to judge, you are (how the hell did Yoda get in here?)...  (Damn. No AR-15 icon. Oh well.)

[tristan_geoff]

i'd rather not have the whole forum know my contact info tbh.  can't trust some o y'all I stg...

I back Lexi we shud just share with whoever we already are, if I die you'll prob hear about it someway

[innerspaceboy]

I wouldn't mind someone having one of my email addresses in case I disappear. I contemplate/plan/arrange my death several times a week so if I suddenly stop contributing permanently the group might want to know of my passing.

[Guybrush]

Me and @Trollheart actually have the emails you all signed up with already. That is, we're able to look them up.

To me, it's a little hard to know where the line is between what's alright and what's an invasion of privacy. Ultimately, I prefer to err on the side of caution and do not want to send anyone here an email unless there's a good reason to. If I leave a forum because I want a break or something, I don't want to get emails from an admin nagging me to come back. I don't want to be that admin either.

As of today, I've sent emails to two members who were gone and who I wanted to check up on. One is @Rubber Soul. I haven't got a reply from either. Is it because something happened to them? I don't know.

Maybe a light version of an emergency contact list is simply saying that yes, it's okay that we contact you using that email in the case you inexplicably disappear.

We probably still won't know it if you've died, but I'd feel less awkward trying to find out if something happened to you.