Twilight Tales from the Outer Limits of the Darkside

[Trollheart]

Title: "Ice Age"
Series: Love, Death and Robots
Season: 1
Year: 2019
Writer(s): Philip Gelat, based on the short story by Michael Stanwick
Storyline: In an old-style refrigerator, a couple find an ice cube within which is sealed what looks like a tiny mammoth, with spears in its side. Investigating further, they find an entire civilisation living inside the fridge, a tiny microcosm of prehistoric life. But even as they watch, the civilisation is advancing, maturing, developing. By the time they've buried the tiny mammoth in the soil of a plant and check back, the tiny people have advanced to an industrial age. Buildings are rising, roads are being built, crude transport moves across the cities. Eventually of course they reach nuclear capability, start a war and destroy themselves. The couple close the fridge, and an hour later wonder if the civilisation in there has been rebuilt yet?

They have, and they've come back better than before. They're now far more advanced than we are, and in fact send some sort of probe out of the fridge and into the couple's room, into the real world. But then the fridge is empty, and it looks like the tiny people have moved on to some other dimension maybe? There's nothing left inside the fridge anyhow, so they unplug it and go to bed. In the morning they check again, and everything has reset, with dinosaurs now pursuing ape-like creatures. I guess the cycle of life goes on and on, endlessly repeating.

Things I thought would happen, but didn't: First I thought the creatures might end up in our universe and maybe take over, then I thought it might zoom out and the couple would be in a refrigerator being looked at in wonder by some other giants. Finally, when they unplugged the fridge I thought they might cause some sort of ecological disaster, depriving the civiisation of their power source. None of these things happened.

Things I didn't like: Wasn't too happy about the ending. Bit of a damp squib.

Comments: Very strange. It's a bit odd how easily the couple get used to the idea of there being an entire world/universe in their fridge. I don't think it would be so easy to accept that concept. It also links, doesn't it, to the Treehouse of Horror Simpsons episode where Lisa creates life in a bowl of dirt or something. A story with which a lot more could and should have been done.

Rating:

[Trollheart]

Title: "Eugene, Oregon"
Series: Monsterland
Season: 1
Year: 2020
Writer(s): Scott Kosar
Storyline: Jesus. Apparently in the USA medical insurance can just stop covering certain items of medication! Doesn't happen here, thank the Great Pixie! A guy who is trying to collect his mother's prescription, which should be covered, is told that three weeks ago the insurance company stopped covering it, so now he has to pay over 200 dollars to get the medicine. This is money he doesn't have, so he pays for what he can - about six tablets when he should have been getting thirty - and leaves. Oh wait it's sixty: a thirty-day supply and she's supposed to take two a day. Wow. Those six are not going to last long.

Obviously then, Nick cares for his mother and appears to be her only child (or the only one who cares - been there, done that, still doing it) and he really looks after her, but seems to be making up stories about having friends and possibly a job. While he's playing video games after settling her for the night he looks up and sees some sort of shadow on the wall, which is not his. Immediately he runs out, but when he comes back in he starts talking to the shadow (which does not respond) and then takes pictures of it and uploads them to a forum he's on, asking if anyone knows what this is?

His mother rings the bell system he's set up, and he runs in, to find her hysterical, thinking he has left her. He tells her it was only a dream, but she insists he stay the night with her, so he does. When she's asleep he goes back to the computer and sees replies that direct him to a chat group, who seem to know all about the shadows. They maintain these beings are responsible for all the bad things that happen in life, and are waging a war on humanity. They appear, these guys say, when times are bad, and make them worse. They sow fear and sadness and violence and disharmony. These guys are dedicated to wiping them out.

Nick goes and sits in his father's car, but his phone runs out of power and he ends up oversleeping, resulting in his boss firing him. Now with no job and no money, he walks the street and seems to be looking for someone called Mark Smith, who once worked in the local garage, but neither of the mechanics on duty know who he is, or care. That night he sees the shadow under his mother's bed. He looks again and it's gone, but he goes back to the chat room. Note: these guys are idiots. They're so obsessed with finding some way to avoid having to take responsibility for their shitty lives and their bad luck that they've come up with this theory about Shadows, blaming them for everything bad that happens. Well I have a theory of my own, and here it is: the Shadows are trying to help. Maybe they're ghosts - maybe the one Nick saw is the ghost of his father, trying to support him in some way. The one he saw hasn't, after all, done anything bad to him.

This group seems also to be lobbying for a presidential candidate, Fletcher, who, they say, secretly knows about the shadows. More bullshit I would imagine: conspiracy theories and coincidences, the currency of the weak-minded and the gullible, and those who want to exploit their fears. The girl talks to him and he tells her his father left when he was five; he's the Mark Smith he's been trying to track down, but what hope has he with a name like that? How many Mark Smiths are in Oregon? How many Mark Smiths are in Eugene?

The shadow appears and he chases it with a torch beam, as it flees from the light it heads into his mother's room and he goes after it. He finds his mother having fallen out of her bed. The paramedics say it was night terrors. Things go from bad to worse, as his internet service is cut off for non-payment. Now he can't even contact the Shadow Group. He manages to do so by going to the school - which he hasn't been attending for some months, and how does that work? Isn't his mother going to get into trouble if he doesn't go? Maybe he has some sort of compassionate leave deal? Anyway, the teacher says he left something in her office when he left and she goes to get it for him.

In fact she gets the school guards to hassle him and throw him out. I don't quite know why she has such a problem with him, but maybe that will become apparent later. Right now, he's reached nadir and the guys from the Shadow Group fuel his despair, convincing him that it's all the Shadow's fault and that he should kill it. They show him how, and they decide to livestream the event, to, they say, send a message. Now, you just know these are all going to end up being young kids feeding each others' fears, though the way the episode is filmed, it makes it look as if they're physically in the room with him. Two tough alpha males in their twenties or thirties and a Tank Girl-style maybe teenager, a real tomboy.

Nick builds a sort of flashlight rifle and prepares to take out the Shadow. But then he has second thoughts. What if it isn't some evil creature hell-bent on ruining his life? What if it's just a regular shadow? What if these guys are trying to make him do something he doesn't want to do? Then one of them tells him that he thinks he's managed to track down his father. And he has another family. Now Nick is ready to kill. But in all the excitement he's forgotten his mother, forgotten she needs him, depends on him. He's become cold, distant, selfish. While he's stalking the shadow, his mother is ringing for him. The shadow sinks to its knees, raising its hands in surrender as his mother cries "Where are you Nick? Where did you go?"

Nick fires at the shadow.

Things I thought would happen, but didn't: Thought the shadow might be friendly, maybe his father (this was when I thought he was dead, as the episode makes that originally a little ambiguous). Thought the Shadow Group would turn out to be about ten years old or something. Also thought the Shadow might start bringing him luck. Or that, on the flipside, he might have pursued it into his mother's room and scared her to death.

Comments: This will be a long one, as there is a huge amount wrong with this episode. Apart from anything else, the constant jumping from the computer to real life, showing Nick in physical contact with the others from the Shadow Group makes it seem like they are actually there with him, whereas later it's clear he's just talking to them on the computer, but whether in his head or not, it's made to look like he shares whisky with them, sleeps with the girl, and so forth. Very confusing. Other than that, well, let's see.

Why is the teacher so scared of him that she has security remove him from the school? Was he a danger? Was he thrown out? And how can his manager at Fry Town fire him when there is a backlog of customers? Shouldn't he let him work his shift, clear the backlog and fire him that evening? Also, how does the absence of one staff member lead to such a huge backlog anyway? Is the entire population of Eugene coming to Fry Town for its burger and fries?

Are the shadows real? Are there, in fact, any others, or is the Shadow Group just winding him up? What about this presidential candidate they speak of? He's mentioned once and never again. What happens at the end? Nick seems to force the Shadow to surrender, but shoots it anyway. Is this a metaphor for his becoming cruel, cold and selfish when he has been up to now kind and caring, and sort of accepting his circumstances, shit as they are? Is it now that he has a scapegoat, someone to blame for his troubles that he can release the darker side of him? Has he in fact been talking to anyone or is it all in his head?

When he first sees the shadow he does not seem afraid of it, and it seems quite friendly and harmless, mimicking his attempt at a shadow duck, which seems like a non-threatening gesture. It never shows itself to be hostile, just there. Is it a representation of the anger and frustration he feels with his life? Is it even there or all, or does it just exist in his mind? Has he gone mad? What happens to his mother now?

Too many loose ends, too many unanswered questions to get this any sort of a decent rating, which is a pity, as had things been cleared up (he wakes up in a hospital, never had to take care of his mother, dreamed it all maybe, father by his side) it could have been a good story. As it is though it's just left as if the writer shrugged and said "work it out." No thanks. Do your job, fucker: that's what you're paid for, after all.

Rating:

[Trollheart]

Title: "Toxic"
Series: Two Sentence Horror Stories
Season: 3
Year: 2022
Writer(s): Liz Hsaio, Lan Alper
First sentence: "My friends' jokes are harmless."
Storyline: A bunch of frat boys who enjoy playing pranks on each other spend a night in woods which have a reputation for disappearances. One of their number, Pete, is going off to Yale so this is his last trip with them, and they take advantage by playing all the pranks they can on him. Then things get serious when another one of them, Wes, takes exception and starts getting violent and angry. In the ensuing struggle, another of the boys is killed.  They put him in the camper and drive off, but crash, so they end up having to bury A.J.

While they dig the grave, they see to their horror that the corpse has moved, or been moved. They start to argue, with home truths as usual coming out in the process. They start hearing ghostly voices in the wood, and when they get back to the camper two more of their friends are dead. Then a park ranger shows up. They manage to see her off and when she's gone one of the corpses attacks Wes. The remaining two run into the woods, where the other one tells Pete that, far from being his friend, A.J. was the brains behind the pranks played on him, and not only that, he uploaded them to the web, despite the fact that they had all agreed not to do that.

When it becomes clear then that A.J. resented that Pete had got the scholarship to get into Yale that he had also worked for, and wants to call the cops, Pete snaps and bashes his head in with a rock. Morning comes and he's all alone. Or is he? Making his way back to the camper he is attacked by all four of his dead friends, who kill him, and now there are five corpse spirit zombie things stalking the forest.

Second sentence: "When you're dead, nothing hurts anymore."

Comments: Meh, bit weak. So a bunch of frat kids kill each other and end up as zombies. So what? Very little in this, again very bad payoff. Kind of pointless really.

Rating:

[Trollheart]

23 Tales from the Crypt (down 3)
22 Creepshow (down 5)
21 Tales from the Darkside (down 2)
20 Tales of Tomorrow (up 3)
19 Monsterland (down 1)
18 The Haunting Hour (up 3)
17 Night Gallery (down 2)
16 Are You Afraid of the Dark? (down 3)
15 Creeped Out (up 7)
14 The Veil (down 3)
13 The Outer Limits (down 8  )
12 The Twilight Zone (down 8  )
11 Two Sentence Horror Stories (down 3)
10 Room 104 (no change)
9 Love Death and Robots (down 3)
8 Amazing Stories (up 6)
7 Monsters (up 5)
6 Goosebumps (up 10)
5 Bloodride (up 4)
4 Into the Dark (up 3)
3 Masters of Horror (down 1)
2 Dimension 404 (down 1)
1 Black Mirror (up 2)

Black Mirror retakes its place at the top, while pushing Dimension 404 out to second. Now that the latter show is over, it will steadily start to slide down the chart, assuming the shows behind it have decent stories. The same goes of course for Bloodride, which at least finishes, for now, in a decent fifth position, while Into the Dark comes storming back to take 4th after two excellent episodes over the last two rounds. Masters of Horror remains in the top 3, while Monsters, Goosebumps and Amazing Stories all advance into the top ten. Both The Twilight Zone and The Outer Limits, after bad showings, slide out of the top of the chart.

[Trollheart]

A farewell to kings: now that we've reached the end of the road - A retrospective look at Bloodride and Dimension 404

While some series, particularly those made in the latter half of the last century, will be going for probably years here, having six or sevens seasons or more, there are a few that only got the one, and are now finished. Sadly, for us, two of these proved to be the shining lights of this project, giving definitely The Twilight Zone and sometimes even its spiritual successor, Black Mirror, a run for its money. Each had a paltry six episodes, but what they packed into those six hours of TV each was, in some cases, worthy of several seasons of some of the weaker shows.

So let's look back over them now, and pay both the respect they deserve. It may not be true to say we shall never see their like again, but I can tell you this: as I search vainly for a replacement for both, it has not been easy, and I doubt even those I have selected are going to come close to the consistency of quality both these excellent anthology series provided, episode after episode.

We'll begin with


We kicked off with "Cinethrax", which already showed how classy this show was going to be, with the tale of alien invasion through the cinema screen, and a very dark and honestly quite unexpected ending, which left us on notice that there would not always be a happy ending with this series. That was followed by "Impulse", a sort of time-travel story, though not really, and which provided an important moral, again leaving us with a dark ending. "Chronos", though played pretty much for laughs, a proper time-travel story this time, still gave us an important moral, where responsibility must be taken for one's actions, while "Bob" introduced us to a manic depressive computer who was, well, essentially being euthanised, and managed to somehow make it into a Christmas story too, which overall worked well. "The Matchmaker" was perhaps the best of the bunch, envisioning a future where the effort is taken out of romance and relationships, where you can literally have your soulmate built to order, and if it doesn't work out, send him or her back for (presumably) a full refund. The series ended (for us) then on the rather dark tale of three - really two - kids trying to outwit a computer game which had been taken over by a demon or something. I had issues with "Polybius", multiple ones in fact, but it wasn't terrible.

So the worst you could say about Dimension 404 is that not every episode was perfect, but then, not even Black Mirror gets that pass. No matter how excellent a series is, you can almost guarantee there will be one episode at least in there which will be below par, and I guess you could also say that the more seasons there are, the more episodes will fail to live up to whatever quality bar the series sets for itself. In that way, Dimension 404 rarely fell below the bar, and often rose above it. I'll miss it.



This series starts out with what, for some people I expect, is a pretty major handicap: it's not in English. That is often enough to turn people off, and I know in my youth it was certainly my view that anything I had to read subtitles on got ignored. Having managed to rise above this outdated view, I've been enjoying some of the best and darkest drama Scandi-Noir has to offer, but that's another story, for another journal. Here, the show is made in Norway so everything is in Norwegian (duh) and you have to read the subtitles, but it's well worth it. The premise, as I already explained, but will again in case you're somehow coming late to this, is that every episode a passenger on a bus - the same bus - is focused on and their story told. The first one we looked at, "The Ultimate Sacrifice", blended pagan beliefs with human greed and a healthy (or unhealthy) dose of animal cruelty, while "Lab Rats" provided us with paranoia aplenty as employees struggled to find a way to escape from the cubicle their crazy boss had trapped them in, while "The Old School" was honestly one of the scariest of these episodes of any show I've seen, with a (literally) killer twist I did not see coming. "Three Sick Brothers" may be where this series achieved its peak, with a real blurring of the lines between fantasy and reality (and more violence of course), and then unfortunately it dipped somewhat with the confusing "Bad Writer", which did something similar but in a far more ambiguous way, leaving me unsure how it ended. That left "The Elephant in the Room", which was okay, focusing on office sniping and turning, yet again, murderous, but with a pretty decent twist.

Neither of these series were ever renewed, and given how long both are now concluded it's very unlikely indeed that they will be, and that's really a pity because both had so much potential. Bloodride of course had the massive language gap to overcome, and I suppose Mark Hamill had better and more important things to do in a galaxy far, far away, but even so, Dimension 404 could have survived with a different narrator. Or none. But both are over now, and there's nothing we can do about that.

I therefore have to find suitable replacements for them both, but as Saavik once said to Spock, I could never replace you, only succeed you. So let's hope their successors live up to their legacy.