Support Thread for Marginalized Groups in the US

[Weekender]

Well let's be clear.  "The things we're worried about" should not be conflated. There's a difference between worrying about losing your healthcare vs talking about people being rounded up into camps and contemplating the necessity to join the "resistance." Which one was I more referring to with my initial post? I think that's clear.

I tried to make it even more clear in my first response to Lexi,  but TH still decided to take the angle that I'm just a white guy who "won't be affected" by these things while people are simultaneously speaking about Trump's 2nd term as if it's the coming of the 4th Reich.  You really can't have it both ways.  It's an utterly incoherent virtue signal on your part. That's what I was poking fun of in that bolded section you cited which you apparently took as a serious question. Similar to me saying what do you want from me? That was just a rhetorical question.

Well, trans people are at a much higher risk of being hurt by the Trump Administration right now. I think the sentiment is correct.

[Jwb]

 

You see, for some reason, jwb, you tend to want to or have to see political motivation in everything. It's really quite simple, and I know you know it is, and are just having fun by being the "batlord" to by thread, but as Sherlock Holmes often said, it won't do. Here's the situation in bullet (sorry) points, as I see it.

Trump coming to power scares and pisses me off, but in the most basic way it won't affect me, unless he declares war on Ireland or something. Yes, the political ramifications of what he does or may do will have an affect on me, but no more than any other Irish or European person.

Lexi is my friend, or I like to think she is anyway. She was and is scared about how these next four years are going to aversely affect her life.

I wanted to support her, but more if possible than with a "there there it'll be all right" post. I wanted to set this up as a practical resource which, in the next year or so, can be used by her and others to perhaps get advice, if anyone has any, or if not, then a place she and others can air their fears and tell their stories (good or bad) and where, if nothing else, she and others can come to get support, know that people care about her, or them.

I didn't set it up to make any political point. It's a simple common human decency thing called compassion.

You can see it as "virute signalling" or even smoke signalling if you want, I don't care. I'm not out to be seen as anything other than someone who is worried about his friends and wants to do any small thing he can to help.

I said I wouldn't be affected (and I've said this already) because of whom I am and where I am. That's not a boast, or an "I'm all right Jack" thing, it's just the truth, and acknowledges that I don't have a clue how she or anyone else feels about this coming term.

Lexi, I put your name on it because you were the one so upset that day, you've been the one who has been the most vocal about your concerns, and I thought it would help. I'm not so au fait with the vulnerabilities of others here, but I did include any others affected, so that it would NOT look like you were being singled out (Poor Lexi, let's help her) so I guess you could see yourself as maybe the poster girl for the thread, but not the only one. If you want your name removed from the thread title I'm happy to do that. I don't want you feeling uncomfortable or being used as anything or to make any point, which was never my intention.

That's it. I'm done explaining. The thread is being pulled off course like a Texan in a pickup chasing the Biden campaign bus. I want to draw a line under it now. If you don't agree with the thread, just don't post in it. Like I said, there are plenty of others to post in, and plenty of other ways you can get on my tits.

Hopefully it won't be as bad as we think it may be, but that doesn't mean people who may be affected don't worry. That's just the reality. So can we leave all the theorising and playing it down until we know what actually does happen? I'd be delighted if it all turned out to be the usual Trump hysteria and hyperbole, but once he has his arse in that chair, who knows what his orders may be? You can say I told you so 100 days into his presidency, if it comes to that. For now, do us all a favour and just drop it. Nobody needs your "it's not so bad" and "it won't happen here" mentality. Nobody can see the future: pray for the best but expect the worst, especially with His Orangeness in the White House.

You helped me derail it. By the time you responded to me,  I had already said to Lexi that I understand her concerns and that maybe I spoke too generally but that I see people catastrophizing to an extent that i find counterproductive.  She seemed to accept that explanation, but you felt slighted by my remarks so you had to get your 2 cents in,  and now here we are. 

And no,  I won't keep it to myself. Next time,  don't respond to me if the goal is to have me not respond back. I don't see how every and any concern is welcome except the one I posted. 

[Trollheart]

That's your problem isnt it? You don't see. It's a SUPPORT thread, not a thread where you decide and debate and argue whether support is needed or not. It's black and white, for once. If you post here, you do so to support the people affected. If you don't support them, or think they don't need support or are being snowflakes, or whatever you think, then don't post. Simple as.

[Jwb]

I get it.  It's a thread for you to be melodramatic,  not a thread for me to point that out or poke fun at it.  But I wanted to anyway.  This is what happens when you have a standard set in place that is sort of just a loose norm based on honor and decency rather than a hard rule that is backed up by force.  I'm sure you can find some useful  parallels there to the situation in Trump's America there.

But either way.  I had 2 cents I wanted to put out there that ultimately derailed  the thread.  I'll accept that.  But you absolutely were my right hand man in doing so. You get the assist whether you want it or not. 

[Lexi Darling]

Good evening everyone. I would like to share a little personal update on matters related to this thread's topic.

I had a very productive session with my therapist the other day, and while I won't say I'm hopeful regarding the impending Trump administration, I feel like I have found a plan that is helping me deal with the constant looming threat.

I wanted to try to play it safe; I had plans to move toward being more stealth about my trans identity, but I realized that I would just have been running away. I have been out as trans for 20 years; I have a comfortable life and a happy marriage. By society's metrics I'm a transgender success story. I feel like I'm in a position where me living openly and loudly trans can hopefully inspire others in my community, and I don't mean to come off like I'm gassing myself up. I just want to use the knowledge and experience and resources I have to be there for my community, both trans people and allies.

I want to radiate positivity and joie de vivre, to be a force for doing good in my community, and to make that my primary focus rather than legitimizing powerful transphobic bigots by engaging with their talking points on their turf, playing by their rules. I'm going to focus on lifting up my community, rather than hiding from my oppressors or trying in vain to get them to see reason. I only have one life to live, and I refuse to spend any more of it letting their hate affect my life. Living well is the best revenge.

As always I am so very thankful for your support and kindness.

- Lexi

[Trollheart]

A perfect response to bigoted hatred, Lexi, and I'm sure all your friends will support you. You be the poster girl for Trans People are People Too - hold on, something's coming to me. Let me see... Trans Are People Don't Agitate Never Cede to Evil = TAPDANCE.

Meh, I'll work on it. Point is, kudos to you for your attitude. Be trans, be proud, be you.

[Guybrush]

Wow, very well put, @Lexi Darling 🙂 I love your determination and renewed focus! I hope it gives you some sense of purpose.. something to lift your spirit in these politically dark times.

You're a wonderful person 🙂 I'm so happy you're here and part of my life.

[Trollheart]

I'm thinking maybe

Trans
Are
People
Deny
Aggression
Never
Capitulate
to
Extremism

Maybe.

[tristan_geoff]

I'm thinking maybe

Trans
Are
People
Deny
Aggression
Never
Capitulate
to
Extremism

Maybe.

what are you talking about

[DJChameleon]

what are you talking about

Something about Tap Dancing but idk

[Trollheart]

what are you talking about

Following on from a suggestion I made for an acronym.

[Lexi Darling]

I really don't want to doomsay about this stuff anymore but I just want to put this here and make it clear exactly what we are up against.

(spoiler for anti trans rhetoric and violence)

Spoiler

https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-features/trump-trans-health-care-republicans-democrats-1235198473/

It was never about kids. It was never about sports. It was never about bathrooms. This is what the people who started this hate campaign against us have been working toward the entire time.

For nearly three years I've been constantly told I was overreacting, or that they wouldn't go after adults, or to not call it a genocide, etc.

I just need to know I have some solidarity, that I'm not crazy, that this shit is something to take seriously, and that we can call it what it is, a cruel, unusual targeted act of mass violence with the aim of destroying trans people entirely.

I'm scared, you guys. I'm so fucking scared.

[close]

[Trollheart]

Yeah, unfortunately, quite honestly, it makes bleak reading. @Jwb can laugh about it and trivialise it all he wants, but it does not look good, and with both the House and Senate red, I can't see how Trump doesn't just get anything and everything he wants passed through, a virtual rubberstamp. Democrats may protest "But... but ... but...!" However in the end, they're going to have little to no power to block him. It sounds horrible, and if you have plans, serious plans, to emigrate then I would see no reason not to speed them up. People may laugh at the idea of a Transpocalypse, but I don't think it's too much of a stretch to see it coming, and while it might hurt to see your friends subjected to that, it would be far better for you to be observing it from a safe distance.

Perhaps others will have different opinions? That's all I can say from where I stand. All I know is, if I were living there and in your position, I would not be looking forward to at least another four years under the incoming administration. My advice, stark as it may be, get out while you can. Have you spoken to your doctors? What do they think? They must be preparing for this. Surely they can advise you?

[Lexi Darling]

Yeah, unfortunately, quite honestly, it makes bleak reading. @Jwb can laugh about it and trivialise it all he wants, but it does not look good, and with both the House and Senate red, I can't see how Trump doesn't just get anything and everything he wants passed through, a virtual rubberstamp. Democrats may protest "But... but ... but...!" However in the end, they're going to have little to no power to block him. It sounds horrible, and if you have plans, serious plans, to emigrate then I would see no reason not to speed them up. People may laugh at the idea of a Transpocalypse, but I don't think it's too much of a stretch to see it coming, and while it might hurt to see your friends subjected to that, it would be far better for you to be observing it from a safe distance.

Perhaps others will have different opinions? That's all I can say from where I stand. All I know is, if I were living there and in your position, I would not be looking forward to at least another four years under the incoming administration. My advice, stark as it may be, get out while you can. Have you spoken to your doctors? What do they think? They must be preparing for this. Surely they can advise you?

I appreciate the support. <3

I will say, I didn't and don't want my post to come off as singling out JWB, I'm talking about an internet-wide sentiment (and IRL too really) and for the record I accepted and appreciated his acknowledgement of the medical threat.

I have an appointment scheduled with my endocrinologist for mid-January that will be my official consultation for bottom surgery, but it is a good idea to send a message about it in the meantime and really press her on it; she's said that she and other people in the clinic I get my HRT from all are very against acquiescence to these potential draconian laws so I really want to be frank about this. Thank you for the advice.

[Trollheart]

Yes I do understand what you say about JWB. The reason I "singled him out" is that he was the only one in this thread that made light of the possible problems coming down the line. I'm just pointing out that he, or anyone like him, essentially saying "don't worry about it" or "it's not going to be as bad as you think it is" or whatever other way they're minimising the possible risk to you here and trivialising your concerns, should think again and perhaps not be so flippant.

I'm glad you're consulting with your doctor, and glad too that they're prepared to fight the laws, if they're enacted. However, as the article you linked points out, in the long run if it's between going against the new government and maintaining their funding, they are more than likely to go for the latter. After all, they have to continue to provide a service and make a living, and may end up espousing Spock's mantra of the needs of the many outweighing the needs of the few.

Not meaning to sound unsupportive or anything, but I just wouldn't rely on them standing up to the govt. Good intentions are all very well, but they don't pay the bills, and the reality is that they'll do what they have to do to remain in business.