Trollheart Explodes... Popular Sayings

[Trollheart]

In a world where truth is being twisted into whatever people want it to be, we thought it might be important to debunk some myths that have persisted down through history. So...

Despite what hundreds of songs claim, neither money nor love makes the world go round. It is in fact gravity and centrifugal force that accomplishes this.

It is never advisable to keep one's nose to the grindstone; grindstones are notoriously sharp and not a place to put any part of your body. Yes, especially not that one!

Contrary to public opinion, according to meteorolgical data, it frequently rains without pouring.

Time does not fly when you're having fun, as time is an abstract concept and has no such power of flight.

Similarly, to say the camera never lies is a fallacy. Cameras have never spoken, so the quality of truth they espouse is at best dubious and unproven.

Finally, our condolences go out to Arthur Grimstead of 19 Maple Crescent, Horsham, Essex, who set out on Friday to prove that the pen is mightier than the sword, and in the process lost an arm and a leg, not to mention a very expensive pen. Representatives for Bic, Papermate and other manufacturers of pens were not immediately available for comment.

We'll be back with more stunning news later. Maybe.

[Trollheart]

I'm back! I know you locked the door but I found an open window! Hah!

A little birdie has never told anyone anything, as to date humans have not learned to communicate with animals.

Contrary to what you've heard, what you don't know can hurt you, especially if you're about to step out into the road and don't know there's a bus approaching.

While we of course cannot confirm this, it seems unlikely that every time God closes a door He opens a window, unless He enjoys being burgled. To say nothing of the heating bills in winter!

It is not possible to sleep like a log, as humans are not made of wood.

Nobody who has died has ever bought the farm, as the dead are not allowed to purchase property.

Love cannot break your heart. The only thing that can do this is cardiac infarction.