Ad Astra: Trollheart's Guide to the Galaxy (And Beyond)

[Trollheart]

Note: The next probe to attempt a landing on the Moon was another Russian one, fifteenth in the successful Luna programme, but by now NASA had achieved the ultimate goal and landed humans on the Moon, so the Soviets were really playing catch-up, and perhaps trying to ignore the fact that they had been beaten.

Their first attempt, indeed a last-ditch one to try to pip the Americans to the post, was something of a disaster, and that's putting it mildly!

Luna 15[/b]
Launched: July 13 1969
Reached Destination: July 17 1969
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: None
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: July 21 1969
Termination of Probe: Crashed into the Moon (unplanned)

Still trying to outdo the Americans and refusing to accept that they had won the race to the Moon literally hours earlier, the Soviets tried landing Luna 15 on the Moon to sample the soil, but lost contact with the probe as it descended, and it's believed it may have hit one of the lunar mountains. I doubt there could be a more public humiliation for the USSR during the space race. While Armstrong and Aldrin, their historic mission completed, were preparing to lift off from the Moon, the Russians were crashing their attempt into a rock.

But they were nothing if not doggedly determined, and continued to send probes even as the Apollo programme gained traction and man walking on the Moon became almost a commonplace occurrence. Not really.

Luna 16[/b]
Launched: September 12 1970
Reached Destination: September 15 1970
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Soil samples taken
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Mission Ended: September 24 1970
Termination of Probe: Lander remains on the Moon, sample capsule returned to Earth.

Although the US Apollo mission beat them to it, this was the first time the Russians had managed to retrieve a soil sample from the Moon. After the probe landed, the soil sample was taken and put into the capsule, which a few days later took off again and headed for Earth. It was a very successful mission and a triumph for the USSR - just a pity the capitalists got there first, otherwise it might have made world headlines. Presumably it made Russian State Television news and the headline of Pravda...

Luna 17[/b]
Launched: November 10 1970
Reached Destination: November 15 1970
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Landed Lunokhod 1, the world's first lunar rover, on the Moon's surface
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: September 14 1971
Termination of Probe: Still on the Moon.

Luna 17 was the vehicle which carried Lunkhead, sorry Lunokhod 1 to the Moon and made it the first ever lunar rover to be deployed on the surface of the Moon, so at least they had that over the Americans. Lunokhod's story is told below.


Lunokhod 1[/b]
Launched: November 10 1970
Reached Destination: November 17 1970
Type: Rover
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Took thousands of pictures of the Moon from various vantage points, roamed across the surface taking soil samples.
Photographs Taken: 20,206
Mission Ended: September 14 1971
Termination of Probe: Remains on lunar surface

You've really got to feel for the Russians in one way. Only a few months before the hated Americans actually send men to walk on the surface of the Moon, making history, they're still grappling with the logistics of getting a robotic rover there. I cam imagine the scene  in February 1969 as they watch their rocket take off.  "Hah! We will beat those decadent capitalists by getting our probe to the Moon and have it be the first to drive across the surface of a OH fuck! Look out comrade!  That shit's radioactive! Quick! Into this protective bunker! What? No, no time to warn the people! Fuck the people!"

A few months later it's all over. The Americans have definitively won the Race to the Moon. But the Russkies keep going, sending a rover that this time gets there and take pictures, but by now nobody really cares. America and the USSR are like two bands struggling for recognition  and fame, one of which ends up playing Madison Square Gardens, the other is still playing Madison's Wine Bar in Queens or something.

The Russians have never come back from that massively humiliating defeat. After initial euphoria about Sputnik and their early successes, Russian space achievements seem to have completely tailed off, as if they're just not interested any more, like a moody kid having lost the game kicking a can down the lane with his hands in his pockets muttering "Didn't want to play that stupid game anyway" and desperately trying to convince himself that it doesn't matter. Now Mars is the real target, but so far as I can see, Russia is not involved in those efforts (we'll see in the next article) and space seems to more or less be in the hands of and under the control of the USA. As was once said in The Simpsons, the Moon belongs to America.

The Russians, though, seem not to have got the memo...

Luna 18[/b]
Launched: September 2 1971
Reached Destination: September 7 1971
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: None
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: September 11 1971
Termination of Probe: Crashed into the Moon's surface.

You would have to wonder how, this late in the game, the Soviets were still fucking it up. I guess we'll see that the Apollo programme had its failures too, and nobody is saying the Americans' attempts were flawless, but it seems almost like the roles have been reversed here. Initially, the Soviets got all the glory, got (nearly) everything right, reaped all the rewards, and the Americans were flailing in the dark, with launch after launched cancelled and mission after mission failing. But once the US got things sorted, everything - more or less - seems to have gone smoothly for them (with some notable exceptions) whereas the Russians almost seem to have regressed, suddenly having major problems, failed launches, crashed probes, exploding rockets... like NASA had mysteriously transferred their bad luck and poor planning to them.

Of course, much of this had to do with funding not being available, training being below par and a general antipathy, one would assume, at the Kremlin in the wake of Apollo 11. They might have been thinking "we've been beaten, what's the point in continuing to try?" and given less attention and care to their launches as maybe they should have. Either way, so far as I can see here, they never really recovered, and this was not a minor setback but almost a total defeat by and capitulation to the USA.

Not that it stopped them trying, of course.

Luna 19[/b]
Launched: September 28 1971
Reached Destination: October 2 1971
Type: Orbiter
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Analysed lunar gravitation and concentration of ionised particles; studied the solar wind, took photographs of the lunar surface
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Mission Ended: October 20 1972
Termination of Probe: Unknown; contact lost

Luna 20[/b]
Launched: February 14 1972
Reached Destination: February 18 1972
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Collected soil samples from lunar highlands
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: February 25 1972
Termination of Probe: Lander remains on the Moon, soil capsule returned to Earth.

Luna 21[/b]
Launched: January 8 1972
Reached Destination: January 15 1972
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Deposited Lunokhod 2 on lunar surface
Photographs Taken: 0 (but see Lunokhod 2)
Mission Ended: June 3 1971
Termination of Probe: Remains on the Moon still

Lunokhod 2[/b]
Launched: January 11 1973
Reached Destination: January 12 1973
Type: Rover
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Photographs taken, soil samples analysed, calculations made as to the viability of astronomical observation from the Moon, solar rays observed, magnetic field analysed and so on.
Photographs Taken: 80,086
Mission Ended: May 11 1973
Termination of Probe: Still on lunar surface - was in fact sold to an American game designer, making it I think the first and only lunar rover passed from governmental control to private ownership.

Luna 22[/b]
Launched: May 29 1974
Reached Destination: June 2 1974
Type: Orbiter
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Studied the Moon's magnetic field, gamma ray emissions, the composition of rocks, gravitational field and cosmic rays, took photographs
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Mission Ended: November 1975
Termination of Probe: Likely crashed into the Moon.

Luna 23
Launched:October 28 1974
Reached Destination: November 2 1974
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: None
Photographs Taken:
Mission Ended: November 9 1974
Termination of Probe: Fell over and stopped transmitting; still on the lunar surface

Luna 24[/b]
Launched: August 9 1976
Reached Destination: August 14 1976
Type: Lander
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: Returned soil sample
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: August 22 1976
Termination of Probe: Returned to Earth.

The second and last Soviet mission to the Moon to successfully return soil samples, these ones were significant in that trace elements of water, believed not to be on the Moon, were detected in them.

Lunokhod 3[/b]
Launched: Did not launch
Reached Destination: N/A
Type: Rover
Nationality: Soviet (Russian)
Results: n/a
Photographs Taken: 0
Mission Ended: n/a
Termination of Probe: Held in a Russian museum

Perhaps reflecting how interest in exploring the Moon had been all along based on a desire to beat the Americans there, and how, once they had managed to get there first, Russia's government lost all heart for the venture, the third and final probe in the Lunokhod programme was never launched due to a lack of funding. Says it all really. This was in 1977, and so at this point the USA had established dominance over the space race, and no doubt the Russians were concentrating on more earthly matters.

As a matter of history, a young KGB officer was probably already making plans to bribe, bully, and fight his way to power, first as Prime Minister and later a president who would write a darker and more important page in history for Russia than any of their achievements in the space race.

[Trollheart]

In 1961, as competition between the USSR and the USA heated up in what was known as the Space Race, the Race for Space or the Race to the Moon, American President John F. Kennedy, two years before his untimely death at the hands of an assassin in Dallas, and increasingly worried by the progress having been made by the Communist regime with their lunar orbiters, flyby probes and landers, in comparison to the limited success seen by the US, made this speech:

"I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of landing a man on the Moon and returning him safely to the Earth. No single space project in this period will be more impressive to mankind, or more important for the long-range exploration of space; and none will be so difficult or expensive to accomplish. We propose to accelerate the development of the appropriate lunar space craft. We propose to develop alternate liquid and solid fuel boosters, much larger than any now being developed, until certain which is superior.

We propose additional funds for other engine development and for unmanned explorations—explorations which are particularly important for one purpose which this nation will never overlook: the survival of the man who first makes this daring flight. But in a very real sense, it will not be one man going to the Moon—if we make this judgment affirmatively, it will be an entire nation. For all of us must work to put him there."

This led to the setting up of a space programme intended to allow NASA to create the conditions for sending crewed missions to the Moon, with the intention of humans eventually landing there. American humans of course. Thus was established the Apollo space programme.

Manned Missions

As this is not meant to be a history of that programme, but a list and information on vehicles that actually reached the Moon, whether they flew past it, orbited it or landed on it, I'm only going to concentrate on those missions which actually made it to the Moon, fulfilling those criteria. I must however make known my feelings here, that the only real reason the USA got to the Moon first was a case of "the end justifies the means" when they allowed Nazi scientist Werner von Braun, who had been responsible for Hitler's "revenge weapons", the V1 and V2 near the end of World War II, come to America and work for them rather than face trial at Nuremberg, as I believe he should have done.

How many innocent lives did this man's weapons take, and how many died as a result of his implementation of the Nazi process of slave labour? Was he held accountable? Was he hell. His war record, in fact, was ignored and pushed to one side as long as America got what they wanted, and rather than be remembered as a war criminal and murderer, he now occupies a place in history as both "the father of rocketry" and the man who made it possible for humans to walk on the Moon. I think that's a dark chapter in America's history (not that it hasn't got many of them anyway) that should not be forgotten.

I also understand, before anyone starts flag-waving, that had he somehow been spirited away by the Russians, they would have done the very same thing, and used his knowledge and expertise to get to the Moon before the Americans, also ignoring his war crimes. Generally, as humans, we fucking suck at morals and ethics, especially when national interests are involved.

A year after his historic speech promising to reach the goal of sending a man to the Moon, President Kennedy, in the state in which he would die a year later, reiterated and again justified and dedicated himself to this goal:

"There is no strife, no prejudice, no national conflict in outer space as yet. Its hazards are hostile to us all. Its conquest deserves the best of all mankind, and its opportunity for peaceful cooperation may never come again. But why, some say, the Moon? Why choose this as our goal? And they may well ask, why climb the highest mountain? Why, 35 years ago, fly the Atlantic? Why does Rice play Texas?

We choose to go to the Moon! We choose to go to the Moon ... We choose to go to the Moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard; because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one we intend to win, and the others, too."

Let's be perfectly blunt and honest here: when Kennedy says "mankind" he means "America", and he could easily have answered the question by saying "Because if we don't, those Commie bastards will, and I'll be damned if I'll be the president on whose watch the Soviet Union got another one over on us, one we can never live down or overcome. Look people: they're ahead of us. They got Sputnik into space, they sent a friggin' dog into space, for Chrissakes! Then they went better with the first man in space and the first spacewalk! They got to the Moon before us. Do you really want them to tread those god-damned Commie jackboots all over its surface before we have a chance to? Come on people!" Or something similar. I think, really, that might have served to silence a lot of the dissenting voices raised against this enterprise, or at least made them look un-American. Oh well. One way or the other they went ahead anyway, and five years after his death, with his VP in the White House, and several test flights under their belt - and with the tragedy of the explosion of Apollo 1 on the launch pad with the loss of life of all crewmembers behind them - that day was about to dawn.

[Trollheart]

Apollo 8
Launched: December 21 1968
Reached Destination: December 24 1968 (Merry Christmas, y'all!)
Type: Orbiter
Crew: Frank F. Borman II, James A. Lovell Jr., William A. Anders
Nationality: American
Results: Successfully orbited the Moon, becoming the first humans ever to do so. Transmitted live television broadcast to Earth.
Photographs Taken: 800 (Also 16mm movie film and video broadcast)
Returned: December 28 1968
Issues (if any): Initial problems with the Lunar Module (LM); a bout of sickness for Borman left puke and shit floating everywhere. Nice. I think on the whole I'd prefer ants.

I'm pretty amazed to find that a) the original second-in-command was to have been Michael Collins, who would make history himself later by being on the crew of Apollo 11, but that he had to have an operation and so was replaced by Lovell. Backup crew included Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin! When the LM was delivered there were so many defects in it that it looked as if the mission would have to be delayed, but a workaround ensured Apollo 8 took off on schedule.

So many firsts: first humans to travel beyond Earth, first to travel through the Van Allen belt, first (of course) to approach another celestial body and then orbit it, the first ever sight of Earthrise, as the  Earth rose behind the Moon, first humans to see Earth from space, and of course first humans to return to Earth having been in space. Lovell described their first sight of the moon in a historic broadcast:

"The Moon is essentially grey, no color; looks like plaster of Paris or sort of a grayish beach sand. We can see quite a bit of detail. The Sea of Fertility doesn't stand out as well here as it does back on Earth. There's not as much contrast between that and the surrounding craters. The craters are all rounded off. There's quite a few of them, some of them are newer. Many of them look like—especially the round ones—look like hit by meteorites or projectiles of some sort. Langrenus is quite a huge crater; it's got a central cone to it. The walls of the crater are terraced, about six or seven different terraces on the way down."

Controversy erupted though over the reading of Bible verses during the video transmission to Earth, with an atheist activist claiming the US Government were illegally forcing those of other, or no, faith, to take part in, or at least listen to, Christian prayer, which they might not have been interested in. It was, she said, a form of subtle religious coercion. And while there was no law extant covering the Moon, NASA agreed to quickly re-close that particular can of worms before it spilled all over the place.

Apollo 10
(Note: I have not included Apollo 9 as it was a test flight which took place in low Earth orbit, and never reached, nor was intended to go to the Moon.)

Launched: May 18 1969
Reached Destination: May 2 1969
Type: Orbiter/Dress Rehearsal for landing
Crew: Thomas P. Stafford, John W. Young, Eugene A. Cernan
Nationality: American
Results: Tested out and confirmed all stages of the planned lunar landing successfully
Photographs Taken: Unknown, but also included colour television live broadcast for the first time in history (from space, that is).
Returned: May 26 1969
Issues (if any): Errors in data input during the simulated landing caused the LM to roll, coming very close to crashing into the Moon.

As this was in all but the actual landing identical to what Apollo 11 would achieve, there was some real fear that the crew would not be able to resist the temptation to become the first humans to land on the Moon, and so to forestall this NASA ensured that the return capsule did not have enough fuel to achieve lift-off from the Moon. So, they could have tried it - and possibly, probably even succeeded, making history ahead of time and stealing Armstrong and Aldrin's thunder - but they would have paid a high price, stranded on the Moon with no way to get home. Of course they didn't do it, nor might it have been their intention, but still, it's sobering to hear that NASA were so worried they would, that they had to take these, on the face of it, pretty draconian precautions.

What would have happened had they done it? I mean, it's exceptionally doubtful that NASA would have left them there to die, but the cost of sending another mission up to rescue them, or even carry the fuel to them to allow them leave, would have been prohibitive even if possible, and surely they would have faced major disciplinary action, even criminal charges (misuse of government property? Unauthorised landing?) and been liable for huge fines, considering how much a rescue mission would have cost. And - assuming they didn't die up there - they would have gone down in history as both perhaps the most selfish and most stupid men ever to live. No, on balance, I don't see it.

The mission could have been a disaster though, even without the guys yielding to temptation. After inputting duplicate commands into the LM, it began to roll and they came very close to crashing onto the surface of the Moon, and making tragic history as the first astronauts to die - probably, almost certainly, but at any rate crash - on a foreign planetary body. Not the way you want to make your mark!

Apollo 11
Launched: July 16 1969
Reached Destination: July 19 1969 - Landing on the Moon achieved at 20:17:40 UTC July 20 1969; Neil Armstrong set foot on the Moon 02:56 July 21 1969
Type: Lander
Crew: Neil A. Armstrong, Michael Collins, Edwin E. "Buzz" Aldrin Jr.
Nationality: American
Results: Landed humans on another planetary body for the first time in history
Photographs Taken:
Returned: July 21 1969
Issues (if any):

This was, of course, the big one, the day when the space race, or at least the race to the Moon, was finally and unequivocally decided, with America the winner. Commander Neil Armstrong and Edwin "Buzz" Aldrin landed successfully and walked on the surface of the Moon, becoming the first ever humans to set foot on extraterrestrial soil and broadcast from there. The American flag was planted on the lunar surface ("The Moon belongs to America!") and they walked on the barren wasteland, experiencing the unusual effect of much lower gravity and walking under a sky that was not there, the Moon having no atmosphere. The Russians could only glower and grumble in defeat as they watched the American astronauts leave the LM codenamed "Eagle" and set NASA boots on the soil of the Moon, while the world watched. Hell, I even remember watching it myself, though I was only six years old and had no idea really what I was witnessing.

Oh now that's interesting. I did not know that. Kennedy twice tried to convince the Soviet Union to partner with the US on the Apollo mission, but Krushchev wasn't interested (probably unwilling to have it seen or perceived as the mighty Soviet Union riding on the technological coat-tails of the United States) and when Johnson took over after JFK's death, they dropped the idea. Could have been interesting, and could even have helped thaw out both the Cold War and the Space Race. What-if, huh?

The Lunar Module Eagle landed at 20:17 UTC on July 20 1969, with the now-immortal words of Neil Armstrong "The Eagle has landed" ringing out across the world. A few hours later Aldrin made a short broadcast himself: "This is the LM pilot. I'd like to take this opportunity to ask every person listening in, whoever and wherever they may be, to pause for a moment and contemplate the events of the past few hours and to give thanks in his or her own way"

It's probably due to something of a backlash against the astronauts quoting scripture that Aldrin most likely resisted saying "give thanks to God" or either he or Armstrong falling, Columbus-like, on their knees on the lunar surface after exiting the module. While this might have been an early version of PC gone mad, I do sort of agree: the US government, through NASA, could have been seen to have been attempting to establish the Apollo missions as Christian ones (ironic, as they had named it after a Greek god) and inadvertently or even knowingly forcing the acceptance of Christianity on the Earth, and in effect claiming the moon for the Christian God. So I think while it was probably a real overreaction on the part of those who protested, I can see their point and it probably needed to be made before this became standard on Apollo missions, which might, and possibly did (I'll find out later) include astronauts who were of other religious faiths.

A few hours later again, the Eagle hatch opened and a human first breathed (as it were) the atmosphere of a new world and looked out upon its surface, again as it were, live. A few slow steps down a ladder and humanity set its boot on the lunar surface, as Armstong declared "That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind." Due to a communication glitch, the indefinite article was missed, so that the world heard him say "one small step for man", but he actually said "for a man". Hey, the guy was making history. Cut him a break, eh? After Aldrin joined him on the surface they tested the walking and movement conditions, which, given the much lower gravity, proved both easy and difficult, as in, they had to plan their steps ahead, because it wasn't like normal walking.

A short while later, and in a show of total nationalistic jingoism (though to be fair any country would have done the same) the American flag was planted on the Moon, the first since the Soviets had dropped a pennant globe onto it via lunar impactor, and the first ever raised by human hand on another planetary body. Next, newly-inaugurated President Richard Nixon refused to resist making bank of one of history's greatest moments as he called the astronauts.

Nixon: "Hello, Neil and Buzz. I'm talking to you by telephone from the Oval Room at the White House. And this certainly has to be the most historic telephone call ever made from the White House. I just can't tell you how proud we all are of what you have done. For every American, this has to be the proudest day of our lives. And for people all over the world, I am sure that they too join with Americans in recognizing what an immense feat this is. Because of what you have done, the heavens have become a part of man's world. And as you talk to us from the Sea of Tranquility, it inspires us to redouble our efforts to bring peace and tranquility to Earth. For one priceless moment in the whole history of man, all the people on this Earth are truly one: one in their pride in what you have done, and one in our prayers that you will return safely to Earth."

Armstrong: "Thank you, Mr. President. It's a great honor and privilege for us to be here, representing not only the United States, but men of peace of all nations, and with interest and a curiosity, and men with a vision for the future. It's an honor for us to be able to participate here today."

Of course, had that been today, or a decade later, Armstrong would no doubt have said "men and women of peace", but you can't have everything.

Armstrong and Aldrin collected soil and rock samples from the Moon, and lifted off, after a scare in which the circuit breaker that activated the engine had to be jury-rigged by use of a felt-tip pen (anyone remember "It's an inanimate carbon rod!"?) just before tea, at 17:54. The night before they returned to Earth, the three astronauts made a final broadcast from space to humanity, in which each had his own part.

Collins commented:

" ... The Saturn V rocket which put us in orbit is an incredibly complicated piece of machinery, every piece of which worked flawlessly ... We have always had confidence that this equipment will work properly. All this is possible only through the blood, sweat, and tears of a number of people ... All you see is the three of us, but beneath the surface are thousands and thousands of others, and to all of those, I would like to say, "Thank you very much."

Aldrin, unable to observe NASA protocols and keep his big yap shut about God (fucking Presbyterians!), added:

"This has been far more than three men on a mission to the Moon; more, still, than the efforts of a government and industry team; more, even, than the efforts of one nation. We feel that this stands as a symbol of the insatiable curiosity of all mankind to explore the unknown ... Personally, in reflecting on the events of the past several days, a verse from Psalms comes to mind. "When I consider the heavens, the work of Thy fingers, the Moon and the stars, which Thou hast ordained; What is man that Thou art mindful of him?"

Armstrong (possibly glaring at Aldrin, possibly not) concluded:

"The responsibility for this flight lies first with history and with the giants of science who have preceded this effort; next with the American people, who have, through their will, indicated their desire; next with four administrations and their Congresses, for implementing that will; and then, with the agency and industry teams that built our spacecraft, the Saturn, the Columbia, the Eagle, and the little EMU, the spacesuit and backpack that was our small spacecraft out on the lunar surface. We would like to give special thanks to all those Americans who built the spacecraft; who did the construction, design, the tests, and put their hearts and all their abilities into those craft. To those people tonight, we give a special thank you, and to all the other people that are listening and watching tonight, God bless you. Good night from Apollo 11."

I should probably be fair to Aldrin and point out there here, right at the end, his comrade and commander couldn't keep the Big Guy out of it either, though at least he didn't say "God bless America", so there is that.

With the splashdown of the module and its recovery at 16:51 on July 24 1969, Kennedy's - and America's dream (and the Soviet Union's nightmare) had come true: America had succeeded in sending a man (three men actually) to the Moon and returning them safely to the Earth. The race to the Moon had been won, the Space Race was over, and America had broken the tape first.

If the run-up to Apollo 8 and 10 was the foreplay and Apollo 11 the climax, then to continue the sexual metaphor, all missions after this were where America rolled over and went to sleep, occasionally farting. Tp put it in a nutshell, once the objective had been achieved and everyone had looked at the shiny object they got bored with it, and further missions were greeted with collective yawns. Other than Apollo 13, as we will see and as you surely already know. Apart from that though, there was no excitement, no anticipation, no sense of history, just a "been there, done that" sort of mentality that meant the American public turned away from future space missions.

In fact, now that (to return to the sexual thing again for a moment) the honeymoon was over and the first blush of love had worn off, people now began questioning the morality of America spending massive amounts of money - billions surely - on getting a few men to walk on a floating rock that really, nobody cared about. Considering how little was done after the historic landing, that's hard to argue with. As ever, in America as well as all over the world poverty and homelessness continued to be major curses, as did the enormous gap between the super-rich and the super-poor, to say nothing of race. Actually, let's say something about race.

If there was a dark side of the Moon (there isn't) it wasn't due to anyone with dark skin being on an Apollo mission. As Gil Scott-Heron caustically remarked in 1970, Whitey was on the Moon, and that almost disconnect from reality - considering also the US Government's involvement in Vietnam - served to make Richard Nixon's administration look elitist and pandering to big business, which of course it was. In the fanfare, the poor, the disenfranchised, those of a colour other than white, women and a hundred other minorities got forgotten about, pushed aside, swept away, like beggars at a banquet.

But a story for another journal, probably my History of America one, so we'll keep it till then. Whether the American people were interested or not in the subsequent Apollo missions, we are, and so on we go.

[Trollheart]

Apollo 12
Launched: November 14 1969
Reached Destination:
Type: Lander
Crew: Charles Conrad Jr., Richard F. Gordon Jr., Alan L. Bean
Nationality: American
Results: Second lunar landing achieved without incident; US flag which had fallen as Apollo 11 had taken off replaced with a new one. Soil and rock samples taken; location of Surveyor 3 probe confirmed and parts cannibalised from it. On the way back, photograph taken of a solar eclipse.
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Returned: November 24 1969
Issues (if any): After lift-off in rainy and windy conditions, the Saturn V rocket was twice hit by lightning. This caused problems with the fuel cells, leaving the rocket flying on battery power alone (please plug your Saturn V rocket into the nearest available outlet - power now at 17%) but they were sorted. However there were fears the lightning had also knocked out the release mechanism on the parachute, which would then not deploy after re-entry. Since there was nothing they could do about it if this was the case, and the astronauts were then fated to die, nobody at the Space Centre told them. In the event, of course, there were no issues with the parachute and it deployed perfectly. NASA must have breathed a sigh of relief!  I wonder if they ever told them? "Funny story, guys. You'll laugh when you hear this but..."

Intending to broadcast live colour television footage of the second Moon landing, commander Conrad accidentally pointed the camera into the sun, which fried it and NASA's carefully laid plans. And probably his bonus. Oops!

Apollo 13
Launched: April 11 1970
Reached Destination: Failed
Type: Lander (aborted)
Crew: James A. Lovell Jr., John L. Swigert Jr.,  Fred W. Haise Jr. (Why are so many astronauts junior, I wonder? Why so many named after their fathers? Very odd.)
Nationality: American
Results: Mission aborted after accident forced return to Earth
Photographs Taken: 0
Returned: April 17 1970
Issues (if any): Oh man. Well, you know: thirteen, unlucky for some, and it certainly was for these guys. As most of you have probably seen by watching the Tom Hanks movie of the same name, Apollo 13 suffered almost catastrophic engine failure on lift-off, then encountered problems with the fuel cells of the Service Module (SM) which necessitated a rapid abort and return to Earth, with no guarantee that the astronauts would make it back alive.

Ironically, when, just before the trouble started, the crew held a video introduction broadcast, none of the television networks carried it, as nobody was interested any more. Once the situation began to develop, the entire world followed developments, and in the end at least the return and finally thankfully successful splashdown of the capsule from Apollo 13 was watched by a larger audience than had watched the original Moon landing. Interested was re-awakened in the till-then-boring missions to the Moon, although in a negative way, as people, while thankful the astronauts were safe, considered how it could have been, and for the first time since Apollo 11 began to realise how dangerous it was going into space, perhaps gaining a new appreciation for the men who stepped out into the final frontier, and wondering when the next disaster might be.

No doubt the TV networks privately wished they had had some sort of linkup in the capsule to cover the actual accident and return, but then, that would have been ghoulish, wouldn't it? What if the crew had not made it back? Well, then ratings would have gone through the... let's not go there.

From this almost-tragedy comes the famous and oft-misquoted phrase "Houston, we have a problem" (which was actually "Houston, we've had a problem"). I'm not sure if the other phrase now linked with it comes only from the film or if it had anything to do with the mission, but either way I personally feel saying "failure is not an option" is stupid. Failure is always an option, or at least a possibility or an outcome. I guess essentially, no, failure is never an option, if you consider the word option means something you choose over something else: nobody wants to fail. But success is never guaranteed, so to say you simply can't fail is disingenuous at best, naive at worst. But anyway, it's inextricably linked with the mission now for all time, and luckily for them, failure was not the outcome.


Apollo 14
Launched: January 31 1971
Reached Destination: February 4 1971
Type: Lander
Crew: Alan B. Shepherd Jr. (again with the junior!), Stuart A. Roosa, Edgar D. Mitchell
Nationality: American
Results: Third successful Moon landing and excursion; photographs taken, rock and soil samples returned
Photographs Taken: 417
Returned: February 9 1971
Issues (if any):  There were problems getting the LM to dock with the Command Module (CM) in orbit, which, if not resolved, would have made it impossible to land on the Moon, forcing a humiliating return to Earth and adding to the abject failure of Apollo 13, only a year before. Through some trickery though the LM was docked and the landing proceeded. Even then, a faulty signal kept advising the computer to abort, but this too was worked around. The landing radar also played up, but in spite of all this, the third landing of humans on the Moon was achieved. Not that anyone at this point really gave a shit. Exit from the lander was further delayed by a communications problem. The folks back home were probably watching Dallas.

Shepard did at least leave one lasting memory in the minds of the public that persisted long after the Apollo mission had been cancelled and all but forgotten about. He brought a golf club with him and drove some golf balls on the Moon, the only human ever to do so (or, probably, want to - fucking golf. Sorry). His companion, Mitchell, threw a long, thin tool like a javelin. Because, of course, of the lower gravity both projectiles flew much further than they ever would have on Earth, making the two men, had such records been allowed, easily the record holders for throwing or hitting something over such a distance. I don't know whether Shepard had any arrangement with them, or got paid, but I expect the company that made the golf club, Wilson Sports Products, capitalised like hell on that: "Wilson: the only golf clubs used on the Moon!" or "Wilson golf clubs: they're literally out of this world!" and so on.

Apollo 15
Launched: July 26 1971
Reached Destination: July 29 1971
Type: Lander
Crew: David R. Scott, Alfred M. Worden, James B. Irwin
Nationality: American
Results: Fourth successful Moon landing, deployment for the first time of a lunar rover, a vehicle in which the astronauts could leisurely explore the Moon instead of, as they had on the previous mission, tiring themselves out and using all their oxygen up. Performed an experiment based on Galileo's theory that in the absence of aerodynamic drag two items of different masses and weights (in this case, a hammer and a feather) would fall at exactly the same rate. More samples of rocks taken. Scientific experiments left behind. Satellite released into orbit. First spacewalk (EVA - ExtraVehicular Activity) by an American crew.
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Returned: August 7 1971
Issues (if any): Relatively minor ones, compared to the last two missions. A malfunctioning light on a panel on the LM was a concern, in that it might accidentally fire the service propulsion system, and a broken dial on a tapemeter in the craft left shards of broken glass floating about, but both of these problems were sorted. A more serious one was a leak in the water system, but this was also repaired. The lander then came down on the rim of a crater, which made it unstable and dangerous and could have forced an abort, but they managed to stabilise it.

Interest in the Apollo program flared up again briefly with the introduction of the lunar rover, which fired the imagination of the world and no doubt appealed to car buffs too, being the very first vehicle ever driven on the surface of another planet. It was of course left behind and is still there. Other points that emerged later, which are not entirely relevant here, but refer to commercial deals made by the crew with certain patrons, were looked upon less kindly, and pretty soon the gloss was again gone off the programme, as people turned back to their ordinary day-to-day concerns and left the Moon to NASA. Apollo 16 would be the penultimate mission as the programme wound down to its conclusion.

Apollo 16
Launched: April 16 1972
Reached Destination:
Type: Lander
Crew: John W. Young, Thomas K. Mattingly II, Charles M. Duke Jr.
Nationality: American
Results: Fifth landing on the lunar surface (yawn, by now) , second lunar rover driven on the Moon, positioned with a TV camera so that it could film the departure; second satellite released, second deep space EVA performed.
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Returned: April 27 1972
Issues (if any): Very little. Problems with the lunar lander could have had the mission aborted, but they were solved and the landing went ahead as planned.

Rather upsettingly, and pre-empting a point I'll be making at the end, one of the first things the crew did was take out the trash. I mean, come on! You arrive at a new planetoid and the first thing you want to do is dump your shit on it? Why not take it back to Earth or burn it or something? Anyway, more to come on that, you may be sure.

Apollo 17
Launched: December 7 1972
Reached Destination: December 10 1972
Type: Lander
Crew: Eugene A. Cernan, Ronald E. Evans, Harrison H. Schmitt
Nationality: American
Results: Lunar rover deployed for the third and last time on the Moon; more rocks and soil collected, scientific experiments yawn you can see how the general public soon got bored with this. Oh, and they took mice into orbit to assess the effects of cosmic rays on them. A representative for Equal Treatment for Rodents did not immediately return calls for comment.
Photographs Taken: Unknown
Returned: December 19 1972
Issues (if any): Don't seem to have been any, proving how boring and hum-drum these missions had become.

The final words of Commander Cernan certainly ring through history, but really only because of the irony their sentiments ended up meaning:

"... I'm on the surface; and, as I take man's last step from the surface, back home for some time to come - but we believe not too long into the future - I'd like to just [say] what I believe history will record. That America's challenge of today has forged man's destiny of tomorrow. And, as we leave the Moon at Taurus-Littrow, we leave as we came and, God willing, as we shall return, with peace and hope for all mankind. "Godspeed the crew of Apollo 17."

America has not returned to the Moon almost half a century later.


The American Apollo mission programme had lasted for eleven years, landed five crews of two men (the third remained in the orbiter each time) on the surface of the Moon, returned a few kilos of Moon rock to Earth, conducted countless experiments and cost, at the time, a total of 25 billion US Dollars, which equates to 156 billion today. In terms of space exploration and scientific research (and of course of beating the Russians to it) the programme was considered a success, however once it was finished there was no follow-up, and interest in, and funding for, space exploration dried up until the twenty-first century. Now we're planning trips to Mars, but the Moon remains forgotten and discarded, like a mountain that must be climbed but which, once conquered, is of no further interest. Projected Moon bases, colonies, even mining never materialised, and many are of the opinion that the Apollo programme was a waste of money that could have gone towards healing America's terrestrial problems, such as housing and education.

Although the Apollo programme did unite America - and the world - at certain points, such as of course the Apollo 11 first ever Moon landing and the subsequent almost-disaster of Apollo 13, and briefly again for the first deployment of the lunar rover, interest soon waned and with that came distrust, doubt and worry about how American tax dollars were being spent. Your average Eddie Punchclock or Sally Housewife would not care that certain rocks salvaged from the lunar surface yielded this or that scientific knowledge, or that a satellite proved such and such: they were more concerned with feeding their kids and keeping, or getting a job. So to return to my criticism of the Nixon administration (and it's not just mine of course) it does seem that priority was given almost more to style than substance. Apollo launches look good and Moon walks get you inches of newspaper coverage, but in the end is it all worth it? Is it all flash and bang and pomp and circumstance, while people starve and face injustice back on the good old Earth?

I leave you, in this section, with the words of the poet of the age, already referred to, which sum up the feelings of most ordinary, certainly most black people, about the idea of spending so much money on space exploration while there are problems back home.

A rat done bit my sister Nell.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Her face and arms began to swell.
(and Whitey's on the moon)
I can't pay no doctor bill.
(but Whitey's on the moon)
Ten years from now I'll be payin' still.
(while Whitey's on the moon)
The man jus' upped my rent las' night.
('cause Whitey's on the moon)
No hot water, no toilets, no lights.
(but Whitey's on the moon)
I wonder why he's uppi' me?
('cause Whitey's on the moon?)
I was already payin' 'im fifty a week.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Taxes takin' my whole damn check,
Junkies makin' me a nervous wreck,
The price of food is goin' up,
An' as if all that shit wasn't enough
A rat done bit my sister Nell.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Her face an' arm began to swell.
(but Whitey's on the moon)
Was all that money I made las' year
(for Whitey on the moon?)
How come there ain't no money here?
(Hm! Whitey's on the moon)
Y'know I jus' 'bout had my fill
(of Whitey on the moon)
I think I'll sen' these doctor bills,
Airmail special
(to Whitey on the moon)

"Whitey on the Moon" - Gil Scott-Heron, 1970

The Moon: A White Success Story - No Room for Black, and Certainly Not For Green

Over the course of seventeen missions and five lunar landings, not one black man ever crewed an Apollo spacecraft. Not one black - or even, other than white - face has been seen on the lunar surface, or in a lunar capsule. I don't know if black people worked in the control centres (I assume quite possibly) but as far as front-line personnel goes, it seems black men were fit to fight in America's wars but not to go into space, so it's not hard to see how the Apollo mission and the exploration of space was seen as an exclusively white enterprise. While the last man to leave the Moon, Commander Eugene Cernan, noted rather over-optimistically that the Apollo programme had been for all men and women, it has been essentially whites in space, or as Scott-Heron puts it above, whitey on the moon.

One of the main issues I have, personally, with the Apollo and other missions is the callous disregard for its own ecosystem. Yes, it may not have an atmosphere, it may be a rock, but it's not our personal fucking dumping ground. Aside from lunar impactors being allowed to just, well, impact on the surface of the Moon, we dropped (jettisoned is a nicer word but it means the same thing) rocket stages, control modules, service modules and other shit on the moon or into its orbit, left flags and plaques (okay they're not so bad) and no less than three lunar rovers to sit and rust on the Moon (sure, I know: without any air how can they rust? It's a figure of speech, dumbass) and worst of all, as alluded to earlier, we brought a fucking bag of trash to dump on the Moon!

I mean, I don't know why we didn't just go the whole hog and make the lunar surface our new dumpsite. Think of how much landfill would fit into those huge craters! We could toss our trash onto the high mountain sides of Olympus Mons and shit, strew the whole damn surface with our discarded crap, make the Moon the biggest floating garbage heap in space!

Have we no shame, no sense of ecological responsibility? Oh no wait: look what we're doing and have done to our own planet. Well, the ultimate question then arises, doesn't it?

What, after all that money and time and lives put in danger and TV coverage and study of fucking rock, has been done about the Moon? What is humanity's plan for this barren rock which orbits our home planet? Glad you asked. Before we leave here, let's look into the plans - realistic and fantastic - for what might happen.

[Trollheart]

Colonisation of the Moon

As we've seen, science fiction (and fantasy) writers have been predicting human colonisation of the Moon (and in some cases, alien colonisation or alien life anyway) for centuries now, but writing about it is relatively easy. Making it happen? Ah well now, that's a whole different kettle of ballgames of a different colour. After a basic loss of interest in the Moon, attention is again being given to the possibility of our living or at least working there, although any such project is going to take a long time to come to fruition obviously.

The first real attempts to return to the Moon seem to centre on the Artemis Project, a programme led by the USA but with other nations involved, whose main goal, this time, is to land the first woman on the Moon. You can't help but think that's due to social pressure, that NASA doesn't really care about that, and that it's all for the cameras in a PC world. Not that I have any problem with a woman walking on the Moon, but you'd think it would have been something that they might have tackled before closing off the Apollo program, no? Anyway, that's the goal for 2024. They also intend to create what they call "a sustainable human presence on the Moon". Whether this means a base, colony or what I don't know at the moment but I guess we'll find out. Oh, and they're tendering for businesses to get involved. Just great. Commercialisation of the Moon, why not?

The first spaceflight in this program, Artemis 1, was originally due to be launched in November of this year, but there have been delays, and though it doesn't say so, I have to assume unrest in the USA since the election of 2020 and the impact of Covid-19 has contributed to that delay. Tentative launch date has now been moved to either later December or early January of 2022.I shudder when I hear such phrases as "lunar economy", but I guess that's how things are headed now. By 2026 it's envisioned there will be a space station in orbit called Lunar Gateway and the fifth Artemis mission will dock there. The HLS - Human Landing System - is under development by - guess who? Yeah. SpaceX, otherwise known as Elon Musk's baby. They're going to be responsible for the other space vehicles too, known as Falcon Heavy and DragonXL (sounds like a video game). Guess the Simpsons were right, and soon the Moon will belong to America, in a very real sense.

The Russians, long forgotten and left behind in the Space Race though are not to be left out, and are developing their own system of Moon bases, under the code name Luna-Glob. They intend their lunar bases to be robotic though, cutting out the need for those pesky humans and, possibly, providing a staging area from which the newly-sentient robots and machines can launch a pre-emptive strike against Earth. Nah, it's only robotic while it's being built, then the evil humans will arrive to oppress their robotic slaves. The Russians are being a little more realistic in their ambitions here than the US, planning to only begin construction of the base, to be named Lunny Poligon, or Lunar Range after 2030. Its first orbiter and lander missions are scheduled to take place from 2022.

In our new environment of (incredibly super-super-rich) space entrepreneurism, although NASA and other government agencies are still in the driving seat for such projects, independent, self-financed plans are being drawn up by, among others, Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos to either help or head missions to the Moon with a view to colonisation, or at least the establishment of bases there. In a warped and twisted way, this makes perfect sense. The richest people in the world want to get richer (they ain't offering their services for free, folks!) and intend to exploit, rather than explore, the final frontier in order to do so. That may seem a little cynical, but you can bet that the first lunar bases Bezos establishes will have links to Amazon, and SpaceX is unlikely to face any competition in the contract to supply ships, launchers and whatever else is needed in their efforts.

The nightmare vision of an Amazon-controlled Moon scares the sh[COLOR="Black"]i[/COLOR]t out of me (although I do recall, with a grin, the B-movie Amazon Women on the Moon!) but there is of course no way we can prevent that. Both Bezos and Musk have more money each than the US Government probably, and where there's money there's power. They also have the research and the people to run it, so NASA and the like will have no real choice but to involve them. Let's just hope that when they get their bases built you don't need like an Amazon Prime account to go there or something!

There may be an alternative though. The Open Lunar Foundation is a collection of Silicon Valley entrepreneurs whose stated objective is to "allow denizens of all nations to participate in building a peaceful and cooperative lunar settlement." Sounds promising, doesn't it? I don't know any of these people but maybe you do. They  include Steve Jurvetson, Will Marshall, Chelsea Robinson, Jessy Kate Schingler, Chris Hadfield, and Pete Worden. They seem to believe they can establish a lunar base with less than five billion. Sure where does five billion go these days? Still, compared to NASA estimates I bet it's a drop in the ocean.

Speaking of which, the confirmation of lunar ice – which would mean that there is water there somewhere, as already discussed multiple times in this article – was one of the driving forces that led to rekindled interest in the moon as a colony. One of the main stumbling blocks had always been the difficulty of transporting water there, as it was believed there was no native source. Now that it has been more or less discovered that there is, colonisation efforts can go ahead and now it looks like we're back in the Space Race again, as governments and even private corporations and individuals race to be the first to get their lunar base built.

But of course, it's not going to be as easy as just deciding to build one. There are several serious problems to living and working on the Moon which will need to be overcome before we can even consider beginning construction. One of the major ones is the length of the lunar night, which is about 27 Earth days. That's a long time to lie awake waiting for the morning, but more to the point, it will increase the amount of solar powered light required to light the night, as it's exceptionally unlikely everyone will go to bed for a month! So we'll have to be able to work, ahem, through the night, and that means we need to be able to push back the darkness. Can you imagine the power consumption needed to run lights for a month straight?

Here's another of those videos made for kids. At least, I assume it's for kids. It's ironically great. 

And then there's the cold. The Moon is not a warm place, and while obviously there would have to be habitation domes built (we couldn't just live out on the surface) the method of keeping them permanently heated is another problem. We've determined that there is water on the Moon, but we don't know for sure how deep or where it is, and it may prove hard or even impossible to access, in which case we will have to look for alternative methods of harvesting water, perhaps from passing comets or asteroids. Sounds like fun. There's danger from exposure to cosmic rays (cosmic, man!) which batter the Moon all the time, and proton exposure from the solar wind. The Moon's magnetic field is not our friend either. Moon dust is sticky and abrasive, and may also be poisonous. It certainly will be a hazard to machinery, floating around and sticking to everything. And how exactly do we grow food on this barren, desolate rock? Our native crops and plants aren't used to a night that lasts so long, and likely would not survive it.

Where would the bases go? Given the discovery of water at the poles, and also the areas there that receive perpetual sunlight (known as "peaks of eternal light") at the north pole, this might seem a good choice. Still, it should be noted that this sunlight does nothing to warm up the Moon, which, even at these points, never climbs above -53 degrees Celcius and can fall to twice that. There are natural formations on the Moon which may help create the buildings for bases, such as lunar tubes, hollow remnants of the passage of volcanic lava flows, although ideas have included inflatable habitats and even cannibalised spacecraft. Also considered are underground bases and, um, ones printed on a 3D printer. No, really.

Energy sources could be nuclear (which would of course require the construction of a nuclear reactor on the Moon – wonder what Greenpeace think about that?) or solar, utilising the already-mentioned peaks of eternal light. Rovers would probably be utilised, and expanded to take more than one or two passengers, or even railway systems, probably using the Maglev (Magnetic levitation) models. Then there is even the possibility of a flying lunar vehicle: I guess, given the much lower gravity on the Moon this would be easier to achieve than it would be on Earth. And then we're back talking about space elevators again, but we move swiftly on to discuss the perhaps valid question of why anyone would want to live, or even work on the Moon?

I suppose, given the rapid population explosion we've seen here in the last two centuries it might be expedient, even necessary to find somewhere else to live for some of the population, and of course if it's a military base (which surely at least one of them is bound to be) you'll go where you're told. But I doubt it could ever be much fun there. It would be interesting to hear of the first humans born on the Moon, and then whether they would owe allegiance to Earth or to its satellite, especially should some sort of conflict... but now we're getting far beyond the realm of speculation and into that of science fiction, which is not the remit of this particular part of the article, so we'll drop that.

New and more efficient spacecraft are already being designed, as the Saturn V rockets which blasted Apollo spacecraft into orbit and even their successors are unlikely to be viable for the Moon missions and voyages of the future. But get ready to dig deep for those freight rates, calculated (admittedly at the upper end) at around 40 million dollars PER KILO! You'll certainly be making sure everything is weighed properly before you send it to or from the Moon! Some of the costs may be offset by export from the Moon to Earth; one of the proposed commodities could be helium-3, which occurs in the solar wind and is very scarce back home. What little there is sells for about 1.5 million dollars per kilo, more than a hundred times the price of gold. Helium-3 could be used in the future in thermonuclear reactors.

Whatever happens on the Moon, it will be in our future but that looks to be at least interesting. After being ignored for almost forty years, while interest is not exactly at fever pitch, with such projects as the Mars and Pluto missions taking up most of the media attention, the Moon is at least back on our radar, and who knows, some day someone may read this and marvel that some stupid Irishman thought the idea of building a lunar moonbase far-fetched, as he or she look out through specially tinted and reinforced windows at the busy scene of trains thundering across the lunarscape while flying cars zoom overhead, pop their hologram generator on and roll their eyes as they enjoy the sixteenth reunion of all the dead members of the Rolling Stones.

But for us, that's it. We've spent much longer on the Moon than I had intended, and my fingers are tired tapping out on this ancient keyboard, writing much more than I believed I ever would or could on a potentially dead piece of rock orbiting our home planet. I guess it just proves that even something that seems boring and humdrum can yield some really interesting stories and information.

But if the Moon is one of our most universally recognised and loved celestial symbols, there's another one, off there to the right, that has tickled our fancy and fired our imaginations even more, and that's our next stop.